Leaves Forty-eight - Fifty

December marks the final month of my incredible, wholehearted, fifty-two leaf journey.  It is crazy how quickly time passes, how much changes, and how much the same stays. Leaves forty-eight – fifty have been as exciting as all the others. Enjoy!

 

Leaf Forty-eight: A Bizzy Hike

 

The beautiful thing about dating such a genuine person is that he tends to surround himself with pretty fantastic people. One of the many blessings that I have encountered since meeting Dallas, are his family and friends. Back in August, his cousin Elizabeth (aka: Bizzy), moved to San Diego to start nursing school. Her and I instantly hit it off and in the meantime have established such a refreshing friendship.  I enjoy so much meeting people who have the same regard for life as I do. Bizzy is no doubt one of the kindest, most loving souls I have met. She values the simple moments and gives genuinely to others. Naturally, I have gravitated to her company and admire her ability to manage school, transition to a new city, and fit in a social life. Like I said, we have become fast friends and enjoy many of the same activities. I love spending time with people who want to be active and outside, something I do not take advantage of nearly enough living in San Diego.

 

A couple weeks ago, Bizzy and I planned a Friday afternoon hike to Cowles Mountain.  The hike has a decent incline, with a gorgeous 360° view of San Diego once you reach the top. I have done the climb a couple times, but did not realize until a couple weeks ago how closely located it is to my work. Needless to say, it something I am going to incorporate monthly. After a long week and a challenging caseload, exercising with a good friend was exactly what my mind, body and soul needed. Bizzy is the type of person you can just be with. I thrive with the people who it is effortless to be present with. It does not matter the length of time between seeing one another, or what we do, just the fact to be connecting over a stress-relieving-got-to-give-love-to-myself kind of activity is all that matters. Looking forward to continuing to get to know Bizzy’s genuine spirit as well as feel inspired by her deep regard for life.

 

Leaf Forty-nine: Staying In

 

You know you have found someone great when you can spend a Friday and Saturday night doing absolutely nothing and have no desire to be anywhere else in the world. From the beginning, I have loved how much Dallas enjoys being social. I love going out, meeting new people, grabbing a few drinks, and of course, letting loose on the dance floor. Together, Dal and I have such a great time out. He has made my transition to “adult life” feel less real by keeping me close to the 22 year old world…haha…I enjoy so much being able to go out with him and his friends. On the flip side, Dal and I have some of our best moments together alone simply enjoying one another’s company.  A couple of weekends ago we decided to stay in. We watched movies, snuggled up close on the couch. I never wanted it to end. I love, love, love spending my time wrapped up in his arms, sometimes I think I could stay there forever and never move.  With each new day, I feel closer to Dallas…I understand his heart a little better, love him a little more. This is the most incredible feeling in the world…to know what a healthy, loving relationship is. To be with someone who treats you absolutely amazing. Respects you. Genuinely loves you. I feel empowered at the end of the day to be able to say “this is what I deserve and this is what I will have forever”. Wherever the future takes Dallas and I, the experience together has given me an invaluable gift for the meaning of love, one that will stick with me always.

 

Leave Fifty: 2^nd Tuesday of the Month

 

Last week I met up with my girlfriend and colleague, Chelsea, for drinks and dinner in Little Italy. We had not seen each other since the day we finished our graduate program…needless to say, there was much to catch up on. After three hours of chatting, a few too many glasses of wine and not enough food, we decided to call it a night out of fear of a wicked hangover for a Wednesday morning.

 

I have been incredibly fortunate to develop enduring relationships with genuine, soulful people the last couple of years. Chelsea, no doubt, has maintained a constant inspiration, example, and confidence since early on in my graduate program. She is a beautiful woman, who has taught me a lot about loving myself. I appreciate so much her courage to share her story with me. She has always made me feel comfortable and supported. Meeting up last Tuesday was a reminder of how important connection with good friends is in my life.

 

The last four months have felt a bit lonely on the friend side. A transition to a new job, family challenges, and developing a beautiful love interest, has resulted in the loss of some who I thought I was close with. It has been frustrating, while equally relieving. I have come to find out that the people who truly love me, who know my soul, will continue to remain in my life. A couple years ago, I do not know if I could have reached this same place. I would have been very upset that someone was disappointed or mad at me. I am sad to lose relationships, but I am also realizing what types of individuals are healthy for me. One of thing I have learned and taken to heart from Dr. Brené Brown’s work is the importance of setting boundaries and holding others accountable. As I teach my client’s, setting boundaries is crucial to taking care of oneself. Some people will not be accepting of our boundaries. We may lose those we thought were the “closest” to us. But in the end, if we believe that we are worthy and deserving of love, we will continue to seek out the people who truly bring those things out in us and stimulate growth within our heart.

 

Chelsea has always been a friend that has brought out the best in me. We seem to always challenge one another to be better people, individually, and also in our relationships. As I drove to meet up with her on Tuesday, I had this overwhelming feeling that this needed to become a ritual. I put together in my head something like the 2^nd Tuesday of every month needed to be our time. The second I saw Chels, I ran the idea by her…she was in. And like that, we created the “2^nd Tuesday of the month” girls get together. We are also passing along the invite to another close friend, Jen. Because the fact is, we need people. And by people, I don’t just mean anyone, but good people, who activate our soul. I am guilty of not speaking up and holding others accountable. The consequence of that was surrounding myself with people who made me feel judged and criticized. Life is too short to be spent feeling uncomfortable with friends who are “supposed” to love you for you.